Life as of now

Ilang buwan na rin ang nakalipas. Ang dami ng nangyari. Honestly, sa mga oras na ito, naiisip ko kung nagrereview ba siya or nakatulog na. Malapit na kasi siyang magtake ng nursing board exam sa u.s. i hope she pass that exam she has waited long and exerted so much effort just to ensure she'll pass it. that's her dream after all. After all the dramas, heartaches and troubles we had during a couple of months we have decided to just be friends.. I still love her thou im just pretending im not. It is better this way i know its hard to pretend i dont love her anymore, its hard to pretend that i dont know she's inlove with other guy. Ye its hard but i just have to endure it. As long as she is happy with him its fine with me. What matters to me is her happiness not mine thou i still have a lot if regrets for all the things i have done. I will just be friend with her, supporting her all the way, never to leave her again, up until i can no longer take it. It hurts that once upon a time i had the chance, once upon a time i felt that she has feelings for me and then now it's all gone. well i deserve this after all..

I miss you very much ;(

Halos 3weeks na kitanf di nakakausap. Wala na kong balita sa kanya. Sana mapatawad niya ko sa biglaan kong di pagpaparamdam gusto ko lang hanapin ung sarili ko kasi naguguluhan nako and somehow nahihirapan. Miss na miss ko na siya, hindi ko alan kung pano magsosorry sa kanya nor kung pano ko siya imemessage. Hindi ko alam kung dadagdag pako sa stress niya kaya di ki rin alam kung dapat ko siya kausapin pero sana maging ok na ulet kami, na lagi kaming naguusap at lagi ko siyang nababantayan kahit nandito ako sa malayo. Kahit sobrang busy sa work di ko maiwasanf maguilty sa ginawa ko hayst. Sana bumalik na siya ;( kulang nakulabg ang buhay ko pag hindi ko siya nararamdaman laging malungkot walabg saya mas gusto ko pang nandyan siya:(